Sorry I haven't written in a few days, but boy do I have a story to tell!
On Sunday I realized that I hadn't pooped since the previous Saturday (eight days before) and started to freak out. Also, it was very uncomfortable. So I needed to get rid of whatever was in my body, but I couldn't use a laxative because of my tendency to abuse them. So I drove to a pharmacy and bought an enema, which I tried to use but was unsuccessful. Apparently there was so much... blockage... that the fluid wouldn't even go in. So, although that endeavor was a failure, I did manage to have a small bowel movement later in the day.
Yesterday (Monday) morning I woke up experiencing excruciating pain in my upper right abdomen. I thought that maybe my attempt at the enema had ruptured something so I was scared. I asked my mom (a doctor) for advice and she said that if I get up, eat something, and start moving around that the pain would go away. Didn't happen.
Then at around lunchtime my mom finds me curled up in pain and says "You know this is probably related to your eating disorder. You're skeletal. You need to get a handle on it before it finishes you off; and it will finish you off." Then she told me that I need to gain weight, completely ignoring the acute pain I was in at the moment. That's when I realized that I was not going to get sympathy from her because she believes I brought this pain on myself.
So I took matters into my own hands. I called my insurance company to ask which Emergency Department they would cover and then went there. They had me pee in a cup and take blood, then hooked me up to an IV for fluids. The doctor came in and asked some questions and felt around, but he was not the friendliest guy in the world. Nonetheless, he gave me this vile lavender-colored thick fluid to drink to "put my stomach to sleep." It was disgusting, but it did make the pain less severe. Then he ordered an ultrasound of my upper right quadrant and an abdominal x-ray for me.
I was at the ER for about 5 hours, and probably 4 of those hours were spent lying down, reading. But at around 6:15pm the doctor came in and told me that I have a "huge packet of gallstones." I asked him what causes gallstones and he said "a lousy diet." He told me that if one days I experience crippling pain, brown urine, vomiting, and bloody vomiting or stool I should go straight to the ER to have surgery to remove my gallbladder. I asked him what the likelihood of this happening in the near future was, to which he replied, "Pretty good. You have a nice bag of pearls in there."
So now I'm very scared and ashamed. I'm scared because I feel like a walking timebomb; any minute my gallbladder could rupture. I'm also ashamed because gallstones are usually a symptom of over-eating fatty foods, so now I feel like my meal plan is unhealthy and that's scary too. Now I'm afraid to eat my normal foods because I'm afraid they will either make me fat or will kill me.
I have gallstones, and it is very unfair. I don't know what is going to happen.