Still Grieving

Today started out really difficult but ended relatively well.  Firstly, as I wrote my baby dog's yarzheit post this morning I burst into tears and couldn't stop crying.  I miss him so much and I am still overwhelmed with grief.

Then later this morning I was physically sick-- you really don't want to know the details because it's disgusting.  But suffice it to say that it was a problem with my digestive system and it lasted from 8am to 12pm.  Not fun.

Then I finally had to get dressed and go to work; I had an interview for a job at a frozen yogurt store after work, so I had to dress in nice clothes.  But because of my illness this morning my body image was awful, and it was hard to choose clothes that were acceptable to me.  I finally picked out an outfit (and not to toot my own horn, but it was a pretty cute outfit), but the only thing I could think about all day was how fat I felt and how fat I thought I looked.  Despite my being distracted by bad body image, I think I did a really good job at the interview-- I think I may get the job as long as they don't disqualify me because I'm going to Israel in a week.

Then this evening I talked to DD, my best friend from the hospital last year, on gchat and SB, my friend from my eating disorder group, on Skype.  Both of them were able to distract me from the negative thoughts in my head.  I know I always talk about how I don't have many friends, and that's true, but the friends that I do have are all amazing and I am very lucky to have them.